the longest entry ever

Similarities between me and Eunice:

1. We have the same height and weight

2. We love vintage thingies

3. We are teochew and hokkien mixed (paternal hokkien, maternal teowchew, yes even this is the same!!)

4. We are terrified of gaining weight

5. We love Spirited Away, Howl's Moving Castle and Xiao Qian!

6. We think the hero in Howl's Moving Castle is cool

7. We are bitching sisters

8. We'd rather be bimbos than bitches (ironic compared to point 7 wahaha)

9. We are satisfied with all parts of our bodies except our hips/butts/tighs, tighs especially

10. We learn cantonese

11. We love Nicole Ritchie!!!!!!

12. We think Paris Hilton is actually quite a smart woman.

13. We have very thick hair that grows fast.

14. We prefer Art to DnT!

15. We both wana look sexy before we grow old and our breasts sag to the floor.

16. We admire women with long long long legs.

17. We'd rather have toned tighs than flabby ones. (ok like who doesnt.)

18. We have the same sort of (rubbish) diet. lol.

19. We love flavoured lipgloss.

20. We both had our fair share of experiences in cheerleading. waha.

21. Coffee has laxative effects on us.

22. omg ok there is more but i can't remember at the moment wahaha.


Eunice and me are the NICE SISTERS! (i just tot of that.)


ok so initially i wanted to make this blog private. but after that i can't be bothered anymore about what people think of what i type/say. i mean like it's my blog yeh so if you dun like it or you dun like me then screw off and dun come back.

design school's girl's toilet has like the most hilarious sign. it changes everyday, courtesy of dono which joker.







Lol....and and and.. i have been busy wth PRODUCTION!

take a look at some of our shots..

Project 2 Production:





at Matthew's house testing out the equipment before we go for a trial shoot.

on the shooting day itself..



Matthew helping talent with the make up



Redhead lighting with blue coloured plastic to give a blue-ish lighting to our film.




Headphones and sound mixer to test audio.



Matthew joking while having a break.



Poh Han and his sexy tigh.



Video Production Production:



The guys setting up the camera. HD OMG. Caleb is supposed to act as this bodyguard guy so he’s dressed in blazers and all that shiat.



Zuozhi and Joseph setting up the boom mic.



It was raining on the day of our production and the guys were kind enough to ask us girls to wait for them in the shelter while they film in the rain. And look how they had to trudge back after they’re done shooting! So many guys sharing one pathetic reflector. I think Joseph can’t be bothered to squeeze in with them. Haha. Poor things!



2nd day of production, we went to somewhere spooky to shoot. Guess where?
Anyway I dono what Zuozhi and Soonmei were trying to do. Probably they were teaching each other how to tie up their hair.



Setting up the HD cam in that spooky place.



The duty roster is still on the wall. God knows how long back it is dated. * shudders *



The names of the people who were in charge of the roster is still there. God knows if they are still around. * shudders more *



Gordon in all his glory.

Recce pictures of Video Production:







and wow wow wow wow production is over!!! And I should be overjoyed………………… NOT.

There’s still CDI project to do in which we are still in our pre-production stage. DIE.
Oh yes and awhile back I had Korean dinner with mr wong and his mother. HEAVENLY. The have like this charcoal grill thing and it comes with THRITEEN side dishes. Wohohohohoho..













this is love!



and this rice tea rocks!!

Jessie is love. i will learn more from her. she knows her stand well. i miss you!!

Lastly, I shall not be so dumb and be nice to people who choose to be mean to me. Not anymore. I SHALL JUST STOP WASTING MY TIME. I will just ignore such people. Clearly, they have NO WORTH WHATSOEVER to deserve my time and kindness. I shall invest my friendships and relationships with people who rightly deserve it. I can’t be bothered anymore with such losers who think that my kindness and my being nice to them is an absolute thing. And I don’t give a fuck or two fucks or a trillion fucks about people who judge. I think maybe they should start wearing white coloured wigs with those ridiculous curls. Obviously there are a lot of friends out there who deserve my love and time more.

you think you can agitate me and make me hate you? sorry i don't wana hate. i don't wana burn in hell. i think the hate truely comes from YOUR HEART. i won't even be affected by it. it's so ridiculous that i don't see any point of bothering about it.

Are you reading this you bitch?

Eunice Chiam has the same height and weight as me! wooooooooooo~~

i am in a very deep need to bitch. like SUPER in the need to. i am rather pissed off with.....ahem ahem hallelujah.

omg. i shouldn't be bitching here. it's too pubic public.

i am contemplating a change of blog url again. like ok..i changed to this url becuz too many people know about my previous blog and i lost the privacy to talk about private things...like bitch, for example. and so i signed up for another blog url which is this and now alot of people know about it too.

i open up blogs to share tots with people i am like really close to...i hate it when anonymous people or people i am not close to comes to my blog everyday to read in discreet and get to know so many things without telling me and i dono anything about it.

worse is some fucked up people actually went to the chatango box and just park there and remain quiet like for wad? arouse my curiousity and make me wonder who the heck is it?

no way. i dun play such games. if u wana talk in my chatango box u are free to do so. BUT if u are only parking there then i suggest u fuck ur jiggly pork lard ass off.

and if u are those who have been reading my blog for weeks/months/years and u have not even tagged a single time then fuck off also. chances are we are not close and you just wana kpo about my life that's why u come visit regularly but never bother to tag.

ah shit. ok i am off topic and venting my anger on all these stupid stuff when all i want right now is to bitch about...ahem ahem hallelujah.

and today its black coffee for breakfast, 750ml of chardonnay + 4 panadol for lunch and campbell's corn soup for dinner.

and upapa is like the most shitarded invention ever.

ok off topic.

can't sleep..so much has been going on in my mind. xin may be right, i am growing on barren land, a land with no nutrients. personal growth,yeh maybe. but otherwise, not much growth. yeh, she may be right. but then again, God works in mysterious ways and so we must not judge or decide anything based on our own limited perspectives.

everything happens for a reason. my departure was for a reason, my arrival was for a reason, and i believe all of these are lessons God wants me to learn. perhaps all these are tests and chastisements from Him. perhaps it's His form of discipling me. i dono. all i can say is, i have changed and i don't like this new me at all.

i miss them. but God is the one leading. so i won't act on rash impulses anymore.


thanks xin. i miss u tonnes!

CNY

my CNY was good. catched up with cousins whom i have not catched up with for ages.

first day was just full of visiting and food. the highlight came on the 2nd night of CNY.

we headed down to this place:









here, you'll find singers singing stuff like those in the 7th month ghost festival "concert", as well as singers accompanying lonely old men at their tables pouring and drinking drinks with them. my daddy is the drummer, my uncle the keyboardist, and my aunt works at the reception at this place.

anyway, so we were just sitting at our tables, drinking and chatting and just minding our own business when this weird man sat down beside chris and started to chat nonsense. We couldn't even make out what the hell he was talking about. we got quite irritated. my mum went out to the loo, my dad and uncle were playing on stage. so we couldn't really do anything.

luckily, my aunt looked over from the reception and saw this old man, and she asked a bouncer to chase him away. when the bouncer came, this old man refused to leave, and even sprouted more nonsense, saying we were the ones who invited him to sit at our table! utter bullshit.

and then the bouncer punched him. omg. i don't know whether to laugh or be scared at that moment because the old man was just being tipsy and irritating and the bouncer punched him. it was kinda comical. haha..and then another bouncer came over and both started shouting and attacking him. and then that old man became a little agressive and he turned around and said something to chris with this fierce look in his eyes. then everyone nearby started to look and stare at our table. gosh. it was just mad.

they managed to get the old man away. whew.

on the third day of CNY, relatives came to my place and we had another round of steamboat.



see those little thingies with the pink ears? they're piggy fish cakes. my mum is like so into pigs this CNY.



little piggies in the steamboat! eeeks!!



i have one in my bowl! Lol.



daddy's old school ah beng tattoo. there's my mum's name on it.


that's all for my CNY. and of cuz my hong baos made me very happy. *chuckles*

puppies!

Mocha is a happy mother!



one of her little pups. their eyes have not opened yet.

today marks their one week on earth!

Went to the vet 2 days ago and the vet said Mocha is expecting 3-4 puppies. Gave her a jab of vitamins, and gave calcium pills to help her in her milk production, as well as multi vitamins to give her nutrition and strength for her and her pups.

Today, Mocha went into labour. it was a very exciting moment. Her waterbag broke at about 1.45pm...her first pup only came at 4:16pm...but then.. very sad. the first pup was a really huge one and Mocha had difficulty pushing it out. It was stuck in its membrane and it suffocated to death...very sad...

The rest of the three pups came in 15-30 minute intervals. All were really tiny compared to the first one, so they were easier for Mocha to push out. I tore their membrane immediately to prevent them from suffocating, like what happened to the first one.

The whole process wasn't as bloody and dirty and smelly as i'd expected. In fact, it was rather clean because Mocha licked up everything on her own. I guess all dogs have natural instincts to clean up after their babies. So it was an easy thing to manage.

I still can't tell the gender or the breed of the pups yet. I still don't know which dog breed raped my Mocha. But it's ok. Yes i am sad that we lost the first pup, but it's done. I can now only rejoice over the others that are ok. May the first pup rest in peace and go to heaven.

I've taken pictures and videos of the whole process. I shall post them up soon!

You like to see me suffer, right?

It's ok. I won't retaliate. Do what you want. In the end, you'll suffer the most. Bitterness will eat your heart up, and you will be so consumed by hatred that you will be so sick of yourself.





Mocha is suspected to be pregnant. Me and sis checked up the pregnancy symptoms for canines and they all matched what Mocha is experiencing right now. Her appetite has increased a hundred fold, and her belly is bulging out with tits so huge that she looks like she has a cow's udder.



Scary.

Tmr, if Mr Wong is free and all goes well, we're gona bring her to the vet.

I've changed my driving instructor (finally). Tmr will be my first lesson with my new instructor. Looks like i've got to pospone my driving exam date. That stinky old man (my previous instructor) has not even brought me into the circuit once. How did he expect me to pass? And he didn't allow me to postpone my exam date even! Ridiculous.

Hopefully all goes well with this new instructor.

Mum made little piggies out of red packets. Hilarious.



and i finally got to eat ikea's meatballs!!! (slow i know.)



yum!

as for school, WE'RE LEARNING HD!!! woo! had a training today from this Mr Guna on how to operate the HD cameras...omg one memory card for the HD camera ( we call it the P2 card) costs like..$2000?! and it can only hold up to 8 minutes of content. so we have to bring at least 2 P2 cards out with us when we are filming so we can interchange the cards when one runs out of memory space. We also have to lug around a Mac, so we can upload content into Final Cut Pro on the spot to ensure that the contents in our P2 cards can be uploaded into the Mac and deleted on the spot. Rather troublesome. But in time to come, very soon in fact, we're gona have P2 cards that can store greater memory. and the HD camera rocks! We learned the technic on how to take sunrise to sunset ( don't really have to film the sun from 6am to 6pm, there's a camera trick!) and make objects look like they can walk. The whole equipment is just magical.


problems in the family again. because of them, i don't see a promising future, no matter how much i want to have a successful one. because of them, i can only depend on myself, and i am not even strong enough. i guess my life is destined to be a pit bottom slum always.
What does God want me to learn from it?


mood: sadly struggling

Internal Conflicts

i wish i don't have to eat or sleep. i find both a waste of time. there's too many things i want to do.

am i being over ambitious?

i don't care.




HAFIZ (feez): if you're reading this, can you tag me your email?? thanks!!

stil in school now! just finished night classes and i'm super overjoyed cuz finally EVERYTHING IS CLEARED WOOHOO.

(changboon is actually right beside me now watching me blog wahaha)

sleepless nights BYE BYE rushing frenzy BYE BYE ganjiong spider BYE BYE.

but i know all these rest are just temporary cuz CDI IS STILL IN PROGRESS!!!!!! meanwhile, i must take this time to hibernate to my fullest before CDI kicks into my life and take control again.

sorry to all my beloved peeps (u know who u are) whom i dun have the time to meetup with lately. i muss u all LIKE MAAADDDD. like HUIXIN for example. and ppl like zx, bi, annie, ky..omg i hope they have not disappeared or think i have disappeared or something. bitching is part of my life and i cannot live without it so pls contact me soon!

(rika is singing her soul out right now in the audio room. she has LIKE A SUPER GREAT VOICE OMG u guys should just listen. she has tonnes of her own recordings in the com.)

watched texas chainsaw massacre awhile back at chrice's place. URGH. it's like a gazillion trillion million babillion bombillion times worse than SAW!!! Lord help. such directors must indeed have a truely sadistic mindset. and i really marvel at this point.

wooweee this section is dedicated to MAVERIC AND LITING who helped me rush my children's storybook assignment by accompanying me all the way throught the printing and binding of the book (and the double sided tape of cuz!). omg i am deeply touched to have such helpful friends!! super THANK YOU MUAKS MUAKS MUAKS.

no lessons next month but i wil still be heading to sccool often for CDI. i hope i get a higher GPA or something. hiak hiak.

eh, that's all for my incessant rantings.

off to home sweet home i go, and off to dreamland after that!


*SUNDAY OMG SUNDAY*


current mood: accomplished with a tad bit confusion

for the past one week plus, my schedule goes like this:

8+am: wakes up to do assignment / goes for driving lesson
10am/12pm: project meeting / client meeting
3pm: audio class
6pm:creative writing class
9+pm/10+pm/11+pm(!!!!): reaches home, goes online, check and reply emails, attempt assignments, edit CDI script
4+am/5+am: sleep

Lord help. i want back my ten hours of sleep!

kinda discouraged because i got back some of my results for some of the creative writing assignments and i didn't do very well. not as well as i expected.. i dono wad is wrong. i slogged for it. :(





a shadow it lingers.....

the power of miscommunications

i got into the CDI project!! :D woosh~ gona have a meeting tomorrow morning..i pray that all goes well and this project will provide me with good experience!

something's bothering me but i don't know how to voice it out..whatever it is, blame it on misunderstandings and miscommunications. everything's so cold right now. and it's uncomfortable and awkward. and i seriously dono wad's wrong, or wad's going on. i just pray that i can be able to develop good friendships with the ppl around me. i don't wish to bear hatred or bitterness in my heart because they are really heavy and smelly things to carry around inside.

had a test for creative writing today (well yesterday actually). had to write four short stories on the spot. so we were given 1.a survival story (the kind where you write about shipwrecked on a deserted island) 2.a spy story (the kind where you write about detective stuff and mystery and etc) 3.a love story (do i need to explain? Lol.) and 4.a story of the death of a mother (tragic i guess). and i wrote rubbish for all of those.

for the survival story, i wrote about this guy who got stranded on a mid-ocean island and then he got sucked up by this huge octopus with scales and he has been haunting that island since. HAHAA. a bunch of nonsense. and VVERRRRYY illogical plot and storyline..

for the spy story, i wrote about this super egoistic spy who was the best spy in the neighbourhood and he ignored his boss's warning about the danger of handling this grp of terrorists. and then in the end the terrorists really proved to be too smart for him, so he refused to die under the arms of the terrorists and instead, chose to commit suicide instead. then i concluded by saying that his ego killed him.

omg super illogical and..i dono. really just a whole bunch of nonsense.

i shall spare u guys on the love story and the sad story about the mother's death. cuz they are just..well, sappy sad stuff and i shall just not talk about it.hahahaha.

sorry if i have been appearing really dead tired and anti social recently. well truthfully speaking, i am really tired and zombified becuz i am not used to walking about in the day. see, i have become nocturnal but WAD IS NEW right. :( how. my life is totally upside down.

i love the night better than the day but wad can one possibly do at night? all the shops are closed, not a living being is awake..except perhaps the drunkards below my house but well they are DRUNK. :S it's not like they are nice warm elderly uncles who will invite me to a game of chess at the void deck.. (gee how come i sound like a senior citizen)

i can't play my guitar becuz i'll wake the neighbours and they'd start throwing eggs through my window. i can't sing cuz it'll end up in the same consequence. can't watch tv cuz dad will be watching late night tv! and i love late night tv becuz they show stuff they dun show in the day!! LOL. (bad bad.)

food i'm CRAVING for:

macaroni and cheese from kenny rogers
corn muffin from kenny rogers
oreo cheese cake from cafe cartel
nachos w cheese from the movies
subway sandwiches!!!!!!!!
snapple cranberry raspberry

URGH!!! this is really a serious case of pms.

Sexually harrased first thing on new year's day...and the police can't even do anything about it..talk about justice..

sigh i shan't go into details here because i am not very happy about the whole situation.

school started and it has been fun (albeit a little boring sometimes)...it is also VERY slackish..i can even afford to go to the library to watch SCV during class hours....

well, night classes= nocturnal lifestyle. what can i do?

first day of creative writing class, we're supposed to write about "My Favourite COlour"..and i wrote that my favourite colour is black...and gave all sorts of dark reasons for it. and then my lecturer says that our fave colour determines who we are. so, am i dark? i guess maybe i have always been...look at the stuff i draw since sec school and perhaps you can judge for yourselves..

signed up for CDI project already...our client is the National Cancer Centre...have to do a video for them about chemotherapy...cancer, a topic that hits close to my heart. i think about my late aunt all the time..can't help it.i still feel a hole in my heart whenever she pops up in my mind.that hole there is just an empty space, like something, or rather, somene is missing. hard to describe. but i guess it can only be felt when someone close to you has really left the world.

anyway, i hope i can qualify for this CDI project..i applied for post production positions (editing and audio).guess that's all i'm good at. well, hopefully i can get in and then i can do my overseas student internship..

nothing much to talk about anymore.

current mood:empty

me..i just love being a freak.

If i have a death note, i would write my driving instructor's name on it. (he is such a greedy gambler and a nasty smoker, he stinks BIG time inside and out.) it would go like this:

9pm - Goes to friend's house for a game of mahjong
9:03pm - While playing, starts to sway from side to side as if possessed
9:06pm - After 3 minutes of swaying, starts to fart bombastically at 1 second intervals.
9:10pm - Friends left the table because it stinks too much.
9:11pm - Left alone, starts to gorge down mahjong tiles.
9:13pm - Chokes to death.

HALLELUJAH HALLE HALLELUJAH!

List of things i want need:

-Deathnote (they are selling it!)
-Digital bathroom scale
-MODEM CABLE
-daily planner notebook (i love to be organised!)
-a new wardrobe (not clothes but literally A NEW WARDROBE.my current one is too small to accumulate all my clothes/bags :\)
-new furniture for my room (someone head down to ikea with me please!)
-something, anything, to splash on my bare room walls.

last post before 2006. but i'm not gona write stuff like "Reflections on 2006!" or "Resolutions for 2007!" or stupid stuff like that because i simply can't be bothered.

right.go ahead and say that i am aimless/hopeless/umotivated/SAADD/weird/whatever. let's see who is able to stick to his or her resolutions for the whole of 2007!

Of subject selections,languages,rollercoaster rides and a whole lot of other nonsensical crap.

WOOOO subject selection is always always always so FUUNNN!!!

the subjects i have selected for elective and CDS:



please pray for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i want ITALIAND AND ACTING!!!! ITALIAN AND ACTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OOOO!!

(sorry if you need to use a magnifying glass to view contents in this picture kekeke)

i've been on a rollercoaster ride again. well i still am on it. and i am as bruised as ever. no, i am getting even more bruises. i am mashed to pulp. but i have no choice, even though i wish so much that i can just let go of my grip on this wild rollercoaster ride and plunge to my death, i have to carry on riding on it. (isn't that sad.)

hopefully i will get so mashed up and beaten left and right that i die from it soon then i won't have to go through so much hell anymore.

new year is coming. i'm in no mood to have a happy celebration. i am only in the mood to drink till i drop. lol.

school is starting!! ok..i have a love-hate relationship with school. i am excited to start on my course again and aim to excel in it. but i am also kinda frustrated with the way my timetable is planned for me. urgh.

just think of this: 3pm-9pm on weekdays, 9am-12pm on saturdays!!!

i am just gona be so packed to the brim that i am gona suffocate and die. ha! and the fact that i'd sure turn into a nocturnal beast during this period, say hello to sleepless nights.

but who cares. i have ALWAYS been a night person. nights just thrill every fibre of my being.

by the way i have signed up for overseas attachment. another thing to pray for me peeps: that i can qualify for overseas attachment!!

things to keep my devastated mind occupied:

-improve my (hopeless) french (i am in the middle of learning it still..encourage me!! Lol)
-learn spanish (haven't started)
-learn italian (pray that i get to learn italian for me cds subject!!!)
-learn greek (haven't started)
-improve japanese (haven't got down to practising it ever since i finished my jap cds)
-learn thai (omgosh ever since i went chiang mai, i wana take up thai !!)
-improve my cantonese (yes for the good of all mankind. or rather, for the good of myself so i
can communicate with church peeps better)
-read more english literature books (i didn't get to major in english literature in my sec school
days)
-and finally, draw sooo much that my hand muscles turn distorted (then i can start my very own
art gallery!! )

i think that's about it. the list of things to keep my mind occupied while i am on the rollercoaster ride.

yes i am a LANGUAGE FREAK and i LOOOOVVVEEE LANGUAGES (maybe except chinese). and i wana learn as many languages as possible! and i wana draw as much as possible as well so that i can deliver messages to the people who view my drawings!!!

i miss: Jing Jie (are you honoured that your name is mentioned first?) , Zuo zhi (i wana go your house stay again and this time i make sure i get to eat the cornflakes!) , maveric (stop singing and start hanging out with me!), chang boon (light and shadow productions!), liting (shopping, crapping, bitching! ), pei ru (wooo bitching and you promised to teach me malay!), sophia (you seemed to have disappeared?!), lina (when's the ben&jerry's lipgloss coming out?), yijie (more same classes with yoouuuu!), annie (eh how's u and ur mr BIIIGG EYES?), hui xin( oh you just came over to stay! Lol.), zixian (omgosh it's been AGES since i last saw u babe), bibi (are you in malaysia AGAIN?!), soon mei (little miss strawberry!), omg and the list goes on and on and on and on and....

...and a whoooollleee lota other ppl...ok i am not trying to make myself sound like i am so famous i have so many friends etc etc. but i DO miss so many of you!!

ok mocha is back!!! :D

and if ever a shinigami were to give me a death note, the first name i would write would be my driving instructor's name!!

and yes i am too friggin lazy to blog, even with my ass!

merry christmas! :D

mocha is gone.dun bother to cheer me up.i won't be able to anymore.

yo bitch. you think you so angelic and nice and goody? you think you are this good little pretty pure girl which everyone loves and approves of? get urself a friggin life.

you are nothing but bias, judgemental, FAKE, and you flirt way too much. so don't come and act all holy. you are FAR from holy. you are FAR from angelic. don't think you are some nice little flower and ppl fall for you like bees to honeys.

you only know how to form your own bloody groups and side them only. go side then. you so happy at judgeing ppl and thinking you are so good right? sure. when judgement day comes, lets see who gets the last laugh. may God bless you then. may God be with you, you hypocritical judgeing soul.

miss me!

Gone for mission trip, 8th-16th dec.

:D

My darling girls

Bobo: "Will you stop copying me."
Mocha: "No."

Isn't this such a wonderful picture of bobo....



hee hee....

and mocha has delcared that my bag is her bed.





see. she can't even keep her tongue when she sleeps.

naughty naughty little girl.



moha loves posing in front of the camera.



she is a cam whore just like me.

bobo?



she just diaos. she's uber cool. LOL.

super super random post

hullo world!

here's something super random..

me and chris trying to smile like the Carl's Jr star. ^-^




lol. we really have nth better to do...

sigh...chris ah chris...it's gona be 4 years already! are you feeling old? i am feeling sooooo oooollllddd....

anyway...i have EIGHT more days left in singapore before i fly off for mission trip!! wana meet up with me? faster book me!! (i am bhb.)

Of peppermint mocha and toffee nut delights

muaks :)

wishlist

www.victoriassecret.com

i wish i wish i wish i can get their hoodies, sweatshirts, sleep shirts, cardigans and smocks from here !!! love it. who wana sponsor me? christmas is coming :D i don't mind throwing in sweats and lounge pants to my wishlist. hee hee. oh there's also a dog leash so i don't mind throwing that in for my doggies too :D

am talking to one of my students from lutheran childcare. wonder how are things goin on over there. i have yet to get my pay. praying really hard i receive it this weekend. then at least i got some cash to get by.

i'm craving for pringles. urgh.

by the way, visit www.owemoneypaymoneythefilm.com for a sneak peek at my seniors' wonderful video production.

movies, trailers, commercials, scripts, movies, trailers, commercials, scripts....

Just in case you people are wondering where i have disappeared to, let me provide you with what has been happening in my life. (lol)

Er...ok school has been rather happening. in the month of october, i've watched 17 movies. YES i'm not kidding! and i watched them all for FREE.Lol.i'm not kidding again! haha.... that's the joy of studying video/film production. you watch movies and watch movies and watch movies and that's your homework.trraalalalalala!! and we can get to watch the movies in the school library for free.and we watch movies in class and that's what we do in class.watch movies and discuss and learn from it.so everyday in class it's a different movie/film.and for our assignments we're just givem movie titles and we're just required to go borrow the movies from the sch library or rent them elsewhere etc and just watch it and take note of certain stuff fom the movie and that's it. love it to the max.

This month is also fun. we're learning video editing and scriptwriting. exciting stuff. For video editing, we watch MTVs, trailers, short clips/movies in class to study how other people do their video editing. WOO life is great. Lol.. and for scriptwriting, we watch commercials and trailers to study how people write good scripts. ahhh! loving every moment of school now!!! la la la la..

erm..other than my oh-so-exciting school life (lol), i have also been driving lately. going for driving lessons i mean. so far i have managed to drive from changi back to tampines. Lol. amazing and fun and exciting stuff!! i pray really hard that i can get my license on the first try!

played the drum for church last week. SCARY. but it was a nice change from playing the guitar. i would STILL like to stick to playing the guitar though!! i have not been practicing the guit for days. oh gosh i need to start on it soon!! must perfect perfect PERFECT my playing!!!

on the downside, i am having financial diffculties as i have quit my job (for about 2 or 3 weeks already) and i need to look for a job that's flexible enough to fit in with my timetable...well, we'll see how it goes.

i need to lose that 9 more lbs! it's just 9 more lbs!!!!!! urgh!

oh and to those having A levels, ALL THE BEST! continue to tune in to my blog when you are taking a break from studies! lol.



*flies off*

Cliona!

introducing a new member into the family!!




happy parents!

it was an easy labour.and thank God i manage to keep my slim figure.

haha BULLSHIT la.THIS are the real parents!


:D

yay got a new baby cousin! haha.. happy!

film language project submitted today...have not really slept for 2 nights.madness.i lost 1kg because of that.insanity.

been very irritated dis days due to several problems.why can't she just respect my space? BITCH.acting lyk everything belongs to her.i wish i could just stab a knife through that selfish black heart of hers.super irritated.i HATE it when ppl just come into my room and touch my things and search high and low for things as if my room belongs to them! lyk go AND DIE ok! it's MY ROOM so KEEP OUT!

fumes.HATE YOU FOR ALWAYS COMING INTO MY ROOM TO TAKE MY THINGS U BITCH.

and i'm looking for a foster home.any married couple wants to take in a teenager like me? ahaha...it's free.no fees or papers needed.just tell me u dun mind adopting me and i'll move in straight away.of course i need to have daily needs provided.like CASH for instance.LOL.

jk la.im falling into insanity because i have not ate for 2 days.

chrice trim my hair today!! hahaha!! my hair got snipped again!!!! Lol..



ok cannot see much diff from the front but it's alot shorter at the back.haha nvm...dis pic is probably redundant.

i wonder if i am just a tad too insecure..... i know dat probably alot of ppl there hates me or dun have good impression of me but how? i am not an easy person to understand..

AUNTY MARY GAVE BIRTH TO HER BABY GIRL ALREADY!!! WOOTS.gona go visit her in the hospital tmr! I CANNOT WAIT :D

oh.


HAPPY DEEPAVALI

BYE BYE LONG HAIR!!!! :D

today i bid goodbye to my long hair.

initially i came back from the salon looking lyk dis...



but after dat i felt rather uncomfortable cuz the ends were tickling my neck.besides, i was expecting a shoter cut...and my mum said it would look better if it's shorter.so she snipped off somemore of my hair and now i look lyk dis...



hahahhaa...i feel much better now.dun care how ugly i look.i'm just glad my split ends are GONE GONE GONE!!!

and thanks liting, jj, zz and mave for accompanying me! :D

how much i've changed

Message: Take this quiz, post the results, and seehow much things have changed since then.

3 YEARS AGO TODAYHow old were you?:
- 15

What grade year were you in?:
- sec 3

Where did you go to school?
- Pasir Ris Sec school

Where did you work?:
- unemployed

Where did you live?:
- tampines

How was your hair style?:
- long, rebonded

Did you wear braces?
- took them out not too long ago at that time

Did you wear glasses?
- contact lens

Who was your best friend?:
- xin,zx,bi

Who was your celebrity crush?:
-Brad Pitt, Orlando Bloom

How many piercings did you have?:
- 2

What was your favorite band/group?:
- linkin park,coldplay,american rejects,good charlotte

What was your worst fear?:
-school discipline master

Had you smoked a cigarette yet?
-nope

Had you gotten drunk/high yet?:
-drunk.

Had you been to a real party yet?:
- define real...

Had your heart broken?:
-yup

Had broken someones heart?
- yup

HA HA HA!!! LETS SEE WHAT YOU ARE NOW !!!!!

How old are you?:
- 18

Where do you go to school?
- temasek polytechnic

Where do you work?:
-just quit lutheren childcare centre

Where do you live?
- tampines

How is your hair style?
-wavy, mid length

Do you have braces?
-nope.taken out.proud to have straight teeth now.

Do you wear glasses?:
-contat lens

Who is your best friend?:
-xin,annie,zx,bi,and the poly peeps i hang out with often.

Still talk to any of your old friends?:
-yup

Who is your celebrity crush?
-EMINEM :D :D :D :D

How many piercings now?
- 7. 3 on each year, 1 on naval

How many tattoos?:
- none

What is your biggest fear?:
- God

Have you smoked a cigarette yet?:
-nope

Have you gotten drunk or high?:
- drunk

Have you ever been to a real party?:
- Define real...

Has your heart been broken?:
- Yes

Have you broken someones heart?:
- Yes.

Type ur reactions when somebody say thesephrase to u..

WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS LIKE THAT?
cuz dats just me.

I JUST REALIZED NOW THAT I LOVE YOU?
oh.u mean it took u dat long?

LEAVE HIM//HER ALREADY. YOU'LL BE MUCHMORE HAPPY WITH ME
fuck off.

COME ON. SMILE. YOU'RE CUTE WHEN YOUDO THAT
haha ok. :)

PLEASE DO MY MATH HOMEWORK TOO
go stick a thumb up ur ass.

I AM SO BLESSED TO HAVE SOMEONE LIKEYOU
i'm blessed to have someone lyk u too. :)

WHY DOES MONDAY COME BEFORETUESDAY?
ask God.

I HAVE TWO TICKETS TO THE LINKIN PARKCONCERT. WANNA COME WITH ME?YESSSSSSSS YYYYYEEEESSSS YES YES YES YES YEYYYEEEESSSSS YYYEESSSS YES YES YES YES YES YESS YEESSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YOU ARE ONE OF THE MOST SPECIALPEOPLE IN MY LIFE. DID YOU KNOW THAT?
really? why?

I THINK I'M FALLING FOR YOU
oh.did u hurt urself?

I CAN'T SMILE WITHOUT YOU?
ic.

THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING, BUT YOU JUSTAREN'T HIM//HER
ok.i'm sorry.

NOTHING
if it's really nothing u wun even say it.

WHAT'S YOUR MOBILE NUMBER?
1800-kiss-myass

CAN I HAVE THIS DANCE?
sure, I'd love to. :)

MAY I ESCORT YOU?
It's ok i can manage :)

DO YOU STILL LOVE HIM//HER TIL NOW?
still loving him.

YOU WERE EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING I WANTED.
WERE.WANTED.past tense indicated. so y am i not ur everything now,and why aren't i want u want now?

WHEN WILL I GET YOUR SWEET EYES?
when i'm dead i can donate it to u and u can taste it for all u wan.

MUFFIN STUDENT

i'm supposed to post dis awhile back but i didn't get down to doing it.so now i shall post it.

a few weeks ago me and dear xin were chatting on msn..catching up..and she told me abt dis female at her work place, and dey call dat female MUFFIN STUDENT.

why muffin student? i asked. izit becuz she LOVES muffins and is forever ordering muffins from the cafe dat xin is working at?

no.xin said she'll illustrate the actualy reason.
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HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!!!!

old school craze

thanks to jj, we're all back to playing with digimons! (read abt his digimon at www.k-i-d.blogspot.com hehe) so ytd i dug out mine and i activated it. wee wee.. here's its progress...



just hatched! :)



while it was slping halfway, i decided to on its lights to see how it was doing. and to my delight, it has grown abit!



woke up today to find dat it had past motion..



my digimon eating food!



and having its vitamin!

haha..oh my oh my i can't wait for it to evolve pls! hahaha...

anyway..went to get materials for crocs with jj mave and zz. liting supposed to come but she got no money to get out of the house. so then we were talking abt lizards at the bus stop, saying how we all hate lizards enough to send goosebumps popping outta our flesh. and then ytd mocha came into my room and lay down on the floor. i tot she looked lyk a really huge and black lizard.



urgh. LOL.

i sliced the tip of my pointer finger while playing with the guit. now some of my flesh is exposed. :( and my middle fingertip has a blister. urgh.

anyway, other than the old school digimon, i'm also currently using my old school C WATCH. :) was packing my room one day when i found it so i brought it to the watch shop to have its batteries changed.



hothead!

hehehe....i can't grow up.

pls just go away.

sigh.

400th entry

sch starts in approx 8 hour's time and i am still WIDE awake.

it's ok. then i will b slpy in sch tmr, then i wun have to see faces i dun wana see. LOL.

had buffet at copthorne grand hotel. omg... ate tonnes!! it was really nice! :D went with chrice and his family to celebrate an early bday for chrice. i mainly attacked the desserts. woots woots i got a sweet tooth. and i am hopeless when it comes to pastries/cakes/delis etc. becuz i wun b able to stop myself from wanting to get a bite from it. yummy strawberry shortcake, pies, cakes, tarts...omg. i hardly ate the main food. only had some pasta, soup, salad..oh and i got to try a variety of french cheese! XD

watched JOHN TUCKER MUST DIE few days back. urgh. NICE SHOW OK. go watch it if u haven't!

urgh. sch starts in approx 8 hour's time and i am still WIDE awake.

needs to cool down

ok i shall turn my angst down a notch. feeling dis way just ain't gona make things better.

anyways, work today was terrible. perhaps i am not feeling well enough to handle them today? i dono. i got angry and shouted at them again. it's been quite a while since i last scolded them so fiercely. i think i am just too unwell to endure much longer so i just lost my cool. hopefully tmr will b a better day. God is in control..

dono how long i am able to carry on working. if i really have to stop working due to sch, it's hello to poverty again! no more eating out cuz i wun b able to survive one week if i eat out. boohoos. moreover, i NEED a pair of cross trainers BADLY!!! anyone wana bless me a pair? i desperately need to run and train up my stamina. also, i need to pay up my mission trip air ticket. boohoos. God pls let money fall from the sky!! if not, let a miracle come to pass! lol.

i should keep my emotions in check more often. i have been letting it run wild and its no good at all...

went to town to take pics a few days back..went with chrice cuz he just got his Nikon D50! urgh jealous jealous jealous!! i wan it too ok! hehe. took lots of random pics and concluded that he needs a tripod. i need one too for my cam! urgh. must go takepics again SOON and i shall bring my cam along. hopefully it will b complete with a tripod by then. hehe. wana bless me one as well? XD

oh man...pls let it be a better day tmr!!! I need more grace!

feeling angsty abt sch. it's getting more and more crappy and ridiculous and i am not liking it one bit. i'm in a quit sch mode. sometimes i regret choosing dis sch with fucked up system. but do i have a choice? wadever it is, i am not the sort to lick boots and slave my cute ass away for ppl. i am a rebel at heart and it shall remain so.

passed my final theory test! yay!!! :D and had my first driving lesson on monday. it was fun! driving is fun so if u love me then start saving up and u can buy me a car! :)

went to pasar malam with chrice last night and we brought mocha! so cute and we had lots of fun. and we shared a root beer popsicle with mocha! :D

i think my days at the childcare are numbered. thanks to the fucked up sch system. thanks with hot passion!

feeling blue

sometimes i really wish dat i am a kid again. i dun have to worry abt so many things, and i dun have to worry abt heavy responsibilities. when i was a kid, adults will always say let adults handle their own things, while kids dun have to bother to step in and interfere. now i find myself telling myself, i am now almost an adult, it is time to handle adult matters. it's just so hard to grow up. maybe i am just childish. but, i really just hate it when i feel lyk i cannot handle things. it makes my heart so burdened. simple things lyk turning up late for something becomes a major problem. when u are a kid, and when u turn up late, u can push the responsibilities to ur parents becuz u can just say dat dey were late in helping u prepare to go out. but now, everything has to b made on my own. even a simple thing such as waking up must b done on my own. nobody wakes me up anymore and nobody bothers to wake me up even tho my alarm has been snoozing for half an hour and it is obvious dat i am late. i also dun have to work to earn my own expenses, to keep myself alive. i dun have to spend so much on adult stuff becuz as a kid, all u wana buy are candies and toys. and most are being paid for by parents. as a kid, u dun face deadlines dat make u have to forego nights of slp. as a kid, u dun have to deal with diffficult ppl. as a kid, u dun have to deal with matters of the heart. as a kid, all u had to do when u got into trouble was run to mummy and daddy and u are being sheltered from the storm. as a kid, u dun have the burden of making important choices becuz mummy and daddy takes care of such stuff.

growing up just sux. growing up is such a lonely process. i just wish i can b a kid again.














argh i am feeling terrible now. i hope dis blue-ness wun b here to stay for long.




just wad do i want. i dun really know myself.

yay! weekend is here! but there's still things to do. nvm! one more week and it's holiday for janice! hahaha. XD i cannot wait okokokokokokokok~

my final driving theory test is coming soon! i am so nervous yet excited. hopefully i can pass for dis. it would b great if i can get my license fast.

i want to watch MONSTER HOUSE!! who wana watch with me huh huh huh huh?? hehe.

childcare today was enjoyable :) i was asked to come up with an item for the primary kids for the childcare's end of year concert. am kinda nervous and jittery abt it. God seems to be using me in many ways lately. firstly, making me lead the worship team. and now making me organise an item for the end of year concert. it's rather exciting yet burdening at the same time. whenever such jobs are put in my charge, i will always want to make it outstanding. responsibilites get greater and heavier as u age. :( but i am determine to do my best.

since the kids like High School Musical, i shall use the soundtrack. hopefully i will be able to choreograph something for them asap. imagine my primary one/two kids doing hip hop...HAHA. it's gona be so cute. :) i am determine to make it the best performance.

met our client for our project today. i'm glad dat things are going well so far. i just got to know my grp members. i'm from different course from them (dey're all from interior and architecture design). first time working with acquintances but i think it is a benefit for me as we will always b working with ppl we dono when we go out to work in the future. so dis is my first foray in some REAL team work. :)

tsk.i think i need to lose weigh. LOL.

Introducing....... *drumroll*
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MOCHA!!!!

She's a new member in my family! just arrived on 3rd of september 2006, wagging her tail and looking ard with curious puppy eyes. she's given to me by my daddy's friend. DARN ADORABLE AND SMART!!! initially she was nameless and thus my family brainstormed over wad to name her. after that mum said she looks lyk coffee cuz of the colour of her fur. so we decided to name her MOCHA! :D

plays ball and knows how to fetch the ball. looks at u in the eyes when u talk to her. she actually understands wad we are saying to her cuz she'll respond! omg so darn cute.

ok so right now i have TWO dogs. BOBO AND MOCHA! :D first day bringing 2 dogs for a walk was a headache. i used to only have to control bobo but now its bobo AND mocha pulling at the leash. wads worse was when dey pulled at the opposite sides! almost tore me into two. but it was so fun! i got tangled by their leash! hahaha!

now i stay at home more often. to play with my dogs. lol.

school is getting uber sick.

and it's making me angsty. very.

E very A sshole D eserves G ood B eating E verday

i splurged lyk mad over the weekend and I AM LOVING IT. it's been lyk..ages since i've spent so much..i am feeling so happy and contented and GAY and DANDY.muahaa...

met up with annie!! :D we went to far east..initially wanted to get shoes but none of them appealed to me so i didnt get any. i got a belt and a top instead. and then we went into dis shop selling kinky lingerie and it was so funny and interesting!

they sell men's g-strings made of kinky materials lyk PVC and shiny stuff..and then there was dis g-string with a shapeless thing hanging limply at the front.and then me and annie looked at the mannequin (and the mannequin's penis is erected) which was wearing dat g-string, and we realised dat the limp thing is actually a BIRD'S HEAD!! omg so funny!! and the g-string is blue in colour and annie said it's literally Lan Jiao. HAHAHAHAA...and then they sell roleplay costumes. most of u would b thinking of nurse, or secretary, right. but the shop sells CINDERELLA and SNOW WHITE roleplay costumes! goodness.which guy will fantasize abt Walt Disney's fairy tale princess? funny! they sell bunny costumes as well.and it comes with a whip.naughty.

anyways, yeh my PCOMDI assignment is more or less done. but i'm still not sure if i had done it the right way. i just wana get over school as soon as possible! i really dono if i am gona contiue pursueing my course in design..somehow i am inspired by my dad and my current guitar instructor to be a musician.

OH YES and speaking abt my guitar instructor, he is really cool! he plays at Walla Walla, a bar at holland village, and his playing's really good and then he's got nice tattoos. and i'm so happy becuz he's teaching stuff which i REALLY wanted to learn. lyk, not just playing songs and all the boring chords stuff but getting to know the fret boards and scales and pick picking and five finger picking and stuff. it's gona be so exciting!! i am so hungry to learn wadever he is gona teach cuz it's been ages since i wanted someone to reveal to me all dis stuff.

went little india but couldn't find the genie pants.and then i found out from a friend dat dey dun sell it in little india.so ytd after church i headed down to arab street and i FOUND IT!! but it wasn't wad i really wanted so i didn't get it. plus, alot of shops were closed so it's like a wrong day to go...and then went to suntec and had CARL'S JUNIOR!!!! WOOO NICE!! and then headed to CHINA TOWN in the night and had nice sausages and peanut soup!! YUM. i love it love it.

and of cuz we took lots of pictures!! muahahaha..

hmm..since lyk lately i have been going to places lyk little india, china town and arab street. HAHAA...i feel lyk a tourist. i wana go ARAB STREET AGAIN!

hill billy

HELLOOSSS!! been missing from blogging for quite awhile again! hahaha...woo yay! this month is the last module for my first semester in year 2! how cool is dat !! :D

it's kinda tough tho..it's like the business side of design. we learn how to sell our ideas, write a designer's resume and cover letter and prepar a designer's portfolio. realised that the usual business resume and a designer's resume can differ quite alot. we also have to wear formal for presentations! argh.

and, i'm so glad to have sophia in my class becuz then it would not be so boring!! aahaaaa...today is a better day in class cuz i wasn't like as stoned as the past few days..but right now i'm fretting over my resume, cover letter and portfolio!! i have little skills and little works which i am proud of to present to people. i think my works just sux cuz they are all like just C grade. :( and i have to do dis mock presentation tmr and i am so not looking forward to it! :( !!

wokay. school work aside. last friday i went to SENTOSAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! wooo!! to get a tan. and i sat my VERY FIRST CABLE CAR RIDE!!! omg so SCARY!! i am sucha hill billy! sitting my first cable car ride when i'm already 18 years old while most of the people out there have already sat till they dun wana comment abt it. i think i have to be in it more often to get over my fear of heights. i didn't get sunburnt dis time. just nicely baked to a golden brown. :) but, my limbs are STILL darker than my tummy!!! SO SAD. maybe the next time when i go tanning i shall wear long gloves and pants and leave my tummy exposed. then i might be able to get an even tan :)

Thanks chrice for paying for my first cable car ride!! *kisses

and then last sunday i had DEEEELLLLIIIICIOUSSS teppanyaki at IMM with chrice and his family.omg it was a heavenly meal. i wan more i wan more! i ate like HUGE amounts of beef!! omg. JANICE ATE BEEF!! it's such a heavy meal!! but i love it becuz it just taste like heaven. :)

YAY! meeting ANNIE TMR!!! wooo!! we are gona go far east, and then we're gona SHOP!! YAY!! SHOP!! shoes shoes shoes here i come!

then tmr nite im going LITTLE INDIA WITH CHRICE!!! YAY YAY YAY!! little india!! shop again! genie pants genie pants here i come!!! SHA LA LA LA LA~~~

retail therapy NEVER fails to brighten up my mood. so chrice u noe wad to do the next time i'm upset right? LOL.

well was kinda upset just now at work. the kids are very very difficult to handle today and i dono y..normally dey aren't like dis... perhaps i let them play too much? i dono. i just pray with all my heart that the principal doesn't think or feel that i am incapable. i pray she doesn't fire me or something. hopefully she is able to see that i am doing my best everytime...

wadever it is, tmr will be a better day and God is in control!

p.s ok i promise i'll post up pictures and do up a new blogskin soon alright!

my drawing looks lyk ass but i am not gona give a shit about it. i am feeling so tired and flu-ish, my nose has been dripping the whole day and i am so irritated and i still have to face my school work?! to hell with them, say amen.

so tired of sch. sometimes i think dat sch just sux to a huge scale. so tired of saving money. sometimes just feel like spending and spending. so tired of seeing something i like so much but i cannot buy cuz i have to save.

to hell with all these. i just wan a life. i NEED a life.

after one month of no-life-ness, non-stop sch and work and sch and work, i INSIST on a good break and LOTS of play! and i dun wana care about anything but play!

where have all my kakis gone? xin, annie, ky, y nvr ask me go out towning/shopping? :(

i'm so bored i need retail therapy, i need a night's out with friends to chill and have fun, i need baby to bring me out to play the whole day from morning till night, i wan to have drinking session with friends and baby and just talk cock sing song...

omg.i just wana go out and play! my life shouldn't be so rigid and boring! it should be happening one! ask me out leh ask me out!! people, helloooo?

i am in such a HUUUGEEE miserable stage. video and design trends ending dis month but i am not looking forward to PComDI AT ALL!!!! >:(

but anyways...YAY i got photoshop and flash and 3d max already! wooosh woosh woosh so i can play with them when im super bored.

i got nothing else to say. i am feeling shitty and angsty.

oh! America's Next Top Model tonight!! :D

:(

:(

i had a small little lump growing on my lower lip 3 days back and then it got bigger and redder and rawer and painer..at first i tot it was jsut an innocent pimple but then hey, lips dun have pores so lips shouldn't have pimples. i let mum have a look and straight away she said it is a virus infection.

i was so scared. so i decided straight away i must see a doc. so i went to the doc today (and thank you xin for going with me! ) and the doc pierced my lip with a needle (WITH NO ANAESTHETIC!) and squeezed and sqeeuzed dat lump so hard that my lip bled and dis small little hard seed came out, followed by pus. and then the doc said i have Herpese. OMG. HERPESE!! haiz.

so i gota throw away my lip gloss and wadever lip product i have, and i gota wash my towels seperately from my family members, and i cannot share food or kiss, and i cannot touch it becuase it'll spread to my hands and i cannot go too near to ppl cuz it'll spread. in short, it's just dis contagious virus equivalant to the chicken pox virus.

freaking sad.

ppl who have been hanging out with me recently for the past 3 days, please be careful and take good care!

issue on shu nus

I was reading one of xiaxue's post on Stomp and i came across this paragraph where she stated that she hates shu nus (innocent virgin girls), and wad she said just made me laugh and agree:

"I confess I hate shu nus maybe even more than tight wads, because shu nus are tight wads and also very attractive to men.

I confess that I am very jealous because all my life I try to look better by risking skin cancer to get a nice tan, extending eyelashes etc, and bapoks do the same thing and men say I look like them.

But these shu nus, all they have to do is, I dunno, rebond their hair, keep quiet and smile to everything, and men want to keep them as wives. "

HAHAHA!! so true right! shu nus remind me of SHE and dat makes me wana puke.

National Day

a day of rest today.. went to Taka to yum cha with baby and his family. it was really good. i love yum cha! hhahha...as usual the many varieties of dishes never fail to delight me.

i tried so hard not to think about my work and school assignments today becuz i really wanted to relax and just have fun. but as the day approached to an end, my dreads all came back to me..i felt so heavy inside, wishing i can just run away but i noe i can't. and i got kinda sad. i went home with a heavy heart and attempted to do my school assignments. it resulted in half-hearted work.urghs.

so i chatted with xin dearest online, telling her all that was troubling me. and after that the more we chatted the more i felt better. THANKS XIN!! *hugs

i need to look at things positively. i need to look at the silver lining in every situation.

on a lighter note, I AM DEPRIVED OF PHOTOSHOP! ever since my laptop came back from the hospital, everything which i've installed are gone! :( so i can't make a nice and proper blogskin for the time being. feel so uncomfortable having to make do with such a plain and stupid blog. :S
i also need FLASH!

i WILL revamp my blog in around september or so! dear readers please bear with the ugliness!

XD

To chrice:
Sorry if i got abit cold and moody today. was burdened by some tots regarding work. muakz.

happy national day~ lol.

WOOOO national day tmr..no sch no work...A WHOOOOLLEEE DAY OF PLAY AND PLAY AND PLAY~~~

let's see...this past few days has been really tiring. after school i don't even have the liberty to go out with friends anymore. instead, it's straight to work. the most i only have the privilege to have a quick lunch with friends. gahs. plus projects...i seriously hope my project mates dun think i am irresponsible or something.lol. i am really trying my best.hahaha...and there are some problems going on. hopefully everything will go smoothly for the remaining days, and we wil b able to produce a good piece of video and everyone will b happy in the end. :)

childcare..sometimes i am tired due to having to rush from school. and so on certain days i am just lyk a dead fish...i still play with the kids and be friendly with them but i ain't as strict as before becuz i just simply dun have the physical or mental energy to scold and punish them...it's best to be a cheerful teacher who plays with students. so i won't be seen as those stingy, boring and hated teachers whose presence brings dread to the kids. LOL. still, there are some doubts about work regarding my performance. i feel that i am not performing up to standard and the principal is not really satisfied with me. but then..i dono. maybe i am just paranoid. as you know, being under authority just makes me feel so apprehensive. i wish i have a higher EQ or something. i do get along well with a teacher there though. she's really friendly and ALWAYS talk to me. lol. and there's another teacher which is also friendly. the rest..i am still abit afraid to approach them. afterall, i am only a student and the youngest there with the least experience. still, i'm determined to do my best.

can't believe i am having a break tmr..woosh. one day to let me go out play and hae fun all day and not think about a single thing of what i have to do...a day to just shake off everything and run away from all the burdens.

i just depositied money into my account but then i really think it makes no difference cuz i still have to spend those money anyway. mayb i am just depositing it so that my account balance will increase and dat will make me feel good.....for awhile. lol. i still need to top up my fare card, buy dog supplies for my dearest bobo...so wad's the depositing for man. gahs.

God may send a load. But He will never send an overload. i must not be stressed!

school is to work as is balls is to pussies

HELLOOOOO!!!
IM TAKING A BREAK FROM PSYCHO NOW BECUZ I M HAVING AN INFORMATION OVERLOAD!!~~!!! YAY!!!

ok.psycho test tmr and i have yet to finish revising it.HAHA! hallelujah. i pigged lyk MMAAADDD today.gorging on all sorts of food. and slept at intervals during the day.piggish.

gota do storyboard and film our short movie over the weekend.I HAVE NO LIFE YAY! YAY YAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!

HELLOOOOOOO!!!!!

did u miss me? did u miss me? did u miss me?

LOL.

firstly i passed my basic theory test for driving. :) i was rather nervous yet it was rather fun using the touch screen computer to do my test. hehe.

video is a killer. today we started filming. the weather almost killed us. we were dehydrating. yet it took us an hour plus just to get the first shot right! FIRST SHOT ONLY! after dat i had to leave for work and i felt so damn guilty becuz i can't stay to help the grp! :( left for work with a heavy heart...after work i wanted to go back and look for them to help them out with the filming..but i had to do design trends online..haiz.so i tink they are still filming now as i hve not received any calls or sms from them....AND HERE I AM BLOGGING! omg.i deserve to be struck by lightning.

well..reason y i'm blogging now is becuz the stupid e-learning website is down..and i cannot submit my essay..so i gota wait...refresh...wait...refresh... :S e-learning's kinda sucky altho it can b fun in some ways. ok dats a contradicting statement. wadever.

work today was ok ... starting to deal with the kids without getting angry. i realised that if i am nice to them they will b nice and listen to me.if i am mean to them dey will defy me. so i guess i shall stick to being patient and nice to them.anyway, being angry and shouting all the time will make me have heart disease in the future.lol.

argh.crappy post.meaningless words..i still have psycho written test dis saturday and i have not finoshed revising it...i want it to b over so dat at least i have one less thing to do. one less thing to do can make alot of difference ya noe...

school is to work as is balls is to pussies. schooling and working erally is starting to take its toll on me. but yet i am enjoying wad i am doing even tho i feel so burned out. besides, BUSY is my middle name and MULTI TASKING is my alias name. HAHAA. ok la not funny.

Club momo dis saturday? *ponders

anyway, i went to watch Lake House with baby last sunday. we went to grand cathay..and got couple seats!!! so damn comfortable! woosh. Lake house is a nice movie. altho it is ridiculous if u analyse it, but it's sweet and makes u feel warm all over. then we bought nice food into the cinema. and one thing i find super funny abt the cinema is...the screen has curtains -_- .and when the show is abt to start, dey play some stupid marching music and then the curtain opens slowly, revealing the screen lyk its some kinda GOLD exhibit... LMAO!! it's as if lyk watching some circus show!! i mean wad the hell is dat for? as if the audience will go "WOOOOO~~~" when the curtain is "revealed". ROFL.

k la.gota go.

woooweee

wohohoho sch has started! video and design trends and issues.

assignments given on the first day...video assignment which is to be done in 2 days.design trends submission deadline at 11.59pm every night.janice is totally not gona have any life dis month cuz she can't even go out anymore after school due to submisson deadline of design trends! BAWLS.
and psycho exam coming next week.driving theory test in 2 days' time.shalalalala..and not forgetting work at the childcare after sch.

janice is a juggler of many things.

i hate the way i think.i wonder wads wrong with me, or my brain, or the stupid way i see the world. wads the use of me talking so much abt personal well being when i am still as screwed up? Annie is right.words are cheap.i should just shut up and stop going on abt my sob stories and just do something prove that i can change to be a better person.

childcare today was horrible.the twins sprayed water onto my face and shirt and i was so so so so engraged i dragged them to the office, barefooted too, becuz dey refused to wear their shoes.after dat i went back to the classroom, mood a little better as 2 problem kids gone. then i said it's time for english yet one of them still defy me.still being rude to me.i scolded him and he scolded me back.saying i am shen jing bing (crazy). i was so damn enraged..but after dat i calmed down and managed to get them to sit at their seats.and managed to give them a comprehension to do.thank God for dat.sometimes just feel so drained of energy by having to deal with those naughty ones but..oh wells.at the end of the day i always manage to calm down somehow unless i am in a really bad mood.sometimes i go home feeling so down and stressed because of them.sometimes when dey are gd and things run smoothly, lyk dey behave and dey listen to me, i go home feeling happy and accomplished.

sorry chris baby.u always have to put up with my foul moods.and also some of my other stupid nonsense...

ytd i went crazy.well, it started with gastric pains halfway during work..dono y i had gastric pains.i ate b4 i went out..but anyway, by the end of the day i was already feeling so hungry and painful dat i went to a bakery shop and bought $7.40 worth of tarts,cakes,donuts and muffins.hahaha...i was lyk an animal, putting wadever delicious thing i see onto the bread tray, not caring abt the cost.all dat was on my mind was to satisfy those hunger pangs and gastric pain.

my gastric didn't really improve after dat though.it lasted through the night and only got well today.my gastric just sux.

i wana go overseas.i enjoy travelling.it's been years since i last sat in an airplane.i wana go overseas! i wana eat airplane food, go airplane toilet.oh do u noe, i have nvr been to an airplane toilet for all the times i sat in an airplane.lol.and i wana play airplane games, watch airplane movies.and i wana watch the clouds, and see the world below me when the airplane lift off...I WANA GO OVERSEAS!!!!!

Asience ROX!! do u all noe wads that? it's a new shampoo from japan,made for asian hair! i jsut used it today.my hair is so soft and smooth right now.and u all noe my hair has always been dry due to the dono how many hundred times i rebonded my hair...ok la 8 times only la not hundered.lol.actually there's one shampoo dats also very gd on my hair and dats L'Oreal Pearl Protein.the pink coloured bottle one.it made my hair so soft and healthy.today i can't find the l'oreal one at ntuc so i decidede to try out Acience.no regrets. :D

one month break is gona be over soon.gona have my basic driving theory test soon.gona have my psycho written test soon.but yet i am not motivated to study for any of dis at the moment.and i dono y i have lost all the motivation.probably becuz i am just so sick and tired of always having to worry abt whether have i studied enough.i just wana get away from all the burdens for awhile.i haven't touched my psycho textbook for 3 days already and i haven't look at my driving theory book for abt a week.i have been on a long procrastination trip and i am enjoying every single moment of it.

:)

lack of updates recently...got tonnes of pics too but then i m not in the mood to post them up..sp u just have to bear with the words and use ur imagination..

went to malaysia recently with baby and his SecCom company..it was fun.we went to visit the ostrich farm and it was super cool! the ostrich egg is darn huge! lyk the size of a baby's head? yeh ard there.and the egg white is ard 70% and the yolk is only 30%.the guy had to DRILL thu the egg shell cuz its 2mm thick, so as to get into the egg..and when the egg white started to flow out i tot it was nvr gona stop cuz its so much egg white!!! and then after dat the egg yolk slowly flowed out and it was only a small portion.and the man said ostrich eggs are gd cuz dey are low in cholestrol and high in protien.and we took pics with ostriches and touched the ostriches...ahahha...it was fun.

then we went to the fruit farm.oh and i finally saw the plant of the dragon fruit.look lyk long cactuses! haha..without thorns. :) we bought red flesh dragon fruits home.very nice.sweeter than the grey flesh ones.and we had lots of tropical fruits la..but i skipped the jackfruits cuz i hate jackfruits.and thank God there's no durian! LOL.

then we had seafood.omg.we had seafood for lunch and seafood for dinner.all the calories!! argh.lol.fat already.

we shopped at Jusco...didnt really have much time to shop.i only got myself 2 Mango tops and baby got himself 2 Topman tops..and we just loaded our shopping carts with snacks,snacks,and more snacks,and chewing gum, and we bought 6 dunkin donuts! lol.dunkin donuts rox.spore dun have it tho.gahs.

i wished the day nvr ended.coming back to spore is so not fun! back to normal life again! :(

and dats the trip to malaysia..i love it so much...enabled me to relax and not think abt work and sch stuff.. :) especially when it's spent with him.it was fun.

visited IMH 2 days ago..it was an interesting trip.we visited the patients...i was rather scared cuz it's lyk a bunch of old men come and then try to talk to u,or stare super hard at u,or are so happy dey wana shake ur hands and bring u to their corners to play...i was scared and also disappointed with my reaction towards them.before the trip i told myself if the patients talk to me i must talk to them nicely.but then my reaction turned out to be so negative dat i am so ashamed of myself.cuz dis patients are very poor thing.most of them abandoned by their families cuz due to their pyshological problems,it's hard to take care of them.and so dey have been staying in IMH for years.sad for them...and another thing abt IMH is dat when we were having out "tour" in the ward we could hear ppl screaming hysterically somewhere in the vacinity...lol..rather scary to us..

went swimming at baby's country club yesterday and had bbq at yoyo's condo with the cell.ate alot,felt fat and bloated and tired...

having some issues with myself.i have changed alot.can't say i lyk dis change in me but yet i dun really mind dis change oso..there are still issues i have yet to settle too..issues i hope wun b pushed away and suppressed but will b able to b solved soon...i noe it needs time..it needs patience..it needs quite a gd deal of waiting..of cooling down, of calming down.but i believe all dis anxiety causing process is gona b worth it in the end.becuz,i am not gona let dis end just lyk dat.no baby, never.

i dono when dis period of uncertainty will end..i hope it will end soon.and i dun mean to hurt anyone in the process of my self-doubts and intuitions.i just had to voice out my fears.i can't possible swallow all my fears and pretend there is nth when i clearly feel uncertain and afraid.i noe it might sound illogical, but maybe dats just me,my personality,always so jumpy,so nervous,so uncertain.and if such a personality is gona hurt the ppl i love the most then i am willing to change it.i just am not willing to lose the ppl i love the most.the ppl hu mean so much to me.

changes are the only constant thing in life and i just have to accept it.yes i am afraid of changes.becuz it brings abt uncertainties, doubts, maybe even paranoia.but, i just have to accept the fact that not all change is bad.changes can be good things.and i just have to relax and not think so much,and not let my mind wonder off to the point that i turn hysteric and start to hurt the person i love.

i shall just relax,and trust God for everything.

solitude

discovered the true love of a teacher...i am starting to like my primary 1 kids alot..even tho dey always make me angry and i have to scold them and punish them, but they also have their cute and adorable side.and even tho i am always very angry with them, i find myself not having the heart to scold them very fiercely..and miraculously, i find myself getting more attached to them and more willing to help out in their class. seriously, i think God put me in this situation to make me learn and realise dat kids can be so lovable no matter how naughty dey are..

and i guess dats God's heart too.no matter how we rebel,forget and disobey Him, He's still always there for us to make sure that no harm comes our way.and no matter how naughty we are, how much we sin, He's always just and willing to forgive us when we confess and apologize and repent.

learnt so much while working at the childcare..definitely an experience worth learning from.i think God put me there to make me realise all the things i mentioned above.

i enjoy teaching them maths, english and chinese, i enjoy bringing them out to the playground to play during their play time..watching them play silly games lyk Colour Catching, Police and theives..lol...and remembering my childhood times when i used to run ard the playground lyk mad playing catching also..

altho dey always fight, but when i tell them to apologise to each other, dey do it. i feel happy when they come to me and wana hold my hand, i feel happy when dey want me to sit beside them. i feel happy when dey tell me silly things and make me laugh.

hahaha....all this stuffs aside, i am a gd ger today becuz i finished everything i ahve to do for psycho this week.everything.lol.i am free from assignments for this week.

WOOSH.

children, childcare, children, childcare

WOOSH.my laptop is back from the hospital! say hello to me! lolol...

my first week working in Lutheran Childcare Centre...it's LOADS of fun...the nursery kids ARE SO DAMN CUTE AHH!!!!! so cute i think im turning into a pedophile! seeing them everyday is just seeing a bundle of pure joy!! woooo~~~ XD XD XD XD XD wish i can bring them home everyday....

i also had to help out at the studentcare...the pri 1 class.my goodness.dey are little monsters.climbing windows, running, fighting, screaming, shouting, being so rowdy...first 2 days i went home feeling so stressed because of them.i can't seem to control them at all!! then after dat i slowly got used to it and slowly learned how to deal with such monsters...these are kids dat hui xin will nvr like. LOL. hui xin u will noe wad im talking abt...

in 2 months time i will be helping out more in the nursery side.I MUST PERSERVERE!!! cuz i just love the nursery kids so so so much..looking forward where i can spend more time with them.heeeee heeeee heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

things are going ok..ronald seems satisfied with my sketchbook.hopefully my grades will b improved.dis month is free..no modules.so..i shall use the time to work as much as i can so i can earn myself some cash...very happy dat i got such a happening job.it's much better in the previous childcare i worked in..

things to do while free this month (in random order):

study psycho
study basic theory
spend time with him
work
tan
swim

i'm missing u.